Whispering Sweet Nothings

The in between of  a relationship.

Isn't it amazing when someone surprisingly feels affection and is impressed by a significant other ??
When being loved unpredictably. When given attention unexpectedly. When feelings are expressed without asking for them. The feeling of being wanted spontaneously.
People should be able to feel and express these types of affection to one another.

"Babe just in case you don't know I find everything about you attractive intellectually, emotionally sexually everything" ,...These are words from my boyfriend. 

I Love Us.

As I read those words my heart beat raised. I began to blush, I couldn't stop smiling. I was in could nine for a minute. All I could think was how beautiful, attractive and smart he made me feel.  I knew he was genuine and best part, it was unpredictable.

I realized that I  have never been told words like these by anyone before without me approaching for it. For instance unless I ask questions like "what do you like about me",  I wouldn't expect a  respond.
The beauty of it is that I didn't ask him any questions. He out of the blue just expressed what he felt.
I was not only more in love with him at this instant but it was such a turn on. I wish he were next to me so that I could kiss him and express how I feel face to face.

This hasn't been the first time that he has given me a compliment. He always tells me I am beautiful. It was just a surprising to me since I wasn't expecting these words at all.

I believe that people aside from being loved should feel appreciated, wanted, and attractive. There may more feeling but these are some main feeling one should feel especially by their significant others.
A  Hey beautiful! An I love you, I miss you or even a kinky text like can't wait to touch you later.
These are words that make anyone feel esthetic! For both women and men.  People want to be needed, wanted and must importantly loved.

One should not only feel them but also express feelings in return. It goes both way!
I tell my boyfriend how handsome he is. When express how much I Love and miss him. I throw kisses at him and foul around with him especially when we are apart. I want him to feel as if I am always with him.

Showing affection is key in all relationship. But it doesn't have to only  be words. You can express affection in gifts, like sending flowers or editable arrangement ( I've gotten some... just because).
Or how about a romantic dinner or massage Or just a simple picture text will do.
It doesn't matter the gesture, the point is to show, and express true feelings to one another when its least expected. To know that there is effort pure into the relationship is just a plus.

I believe That's how one can truly know if they are actually being thought about.

What are your unexpected surprises? any affections you want to share?

Thanks for Reading!
VQ

The in Between of Forgiving and Forgetting.

Most People say in order to proceed with situation of  life its good to always forgive and forget.   I must disagree!

The fact is people really never forget. I always believe yes forgive, let it go and move on.

The fact is  that one should just embrace or figure out how to cope with the situation and let go of the past in order to be able to move on. In order to truly be happy.

I am not spefically targetting  in romantic situation. I am stating in general. In order to find happiness, one must let go of the past issues.
No need to plot revenge, no need to live in anger.
these negative action just lead to hatred and loneliness. 

I had a slightly sad life, moving around,  divorce parents, violence, betrayal all type of heartbrakes. 
I was depressed for a bit and I overcame it by letting it go. By accepting that it is in the past and nothing can be done to repair it expect to move on and continue life with either choosing to be happy or continuing to be  angry and  hateful.
I Chose to love myself. I chose to forgive.  I know that the memories are still there but  in order to  be happy i had to embrace them and let it go, So i did exactly that. Now I can say I am happy.
I Haven't  entirely reached my goals  in but  i am content. I chose to not look back to the times that I was down but to look forward and  process with future goals.

Everyone is different. People cope in their  own way, but there isn't a better feeling then to be happy. To love and to be loved.

I always say kill them with kindness. I will continue to love and treat people how Iwould want to be treated and let life take its course.

Letting go is key  to moving on.

Life is too short to be hateful. One can be living today and tomorrow be gone. So let it goo.
One say people are really over an issue when they are capable of talking about it.
If one is not,  or cry should and anger, They have yet to let it go.

Memories do come and go as people see and expirience event they had share that will remind them of the past, But they will compare how they currently feel and realize its a great feeling to chose to let go.

What are you opinions?? Do you ever really forget??

HAPPY READING!!

VQ

Life as a You Tuber

The in between of a you tuber...

Many people find success by creating You Tube. I agree to a certain extent... How about you?

Aside from gadgets such as a video cameras or phones, to become a successful You Tuber people must have time, consistency, patience and good strategy and must importantly viewers.

Time is needed because it takes time. It take time to make a video especially if people are using multiple videos. It takes time to edit the video. Editing is not an easy task, people have to precise on editing  to capture the perfect moments.

Consistency is needed to please the audience. You Tubers must stay consistent on making video and posting  the video. If a viewer like one video  they are must likely going to search for  more video from the same You Tuber. So consistency is key.

Patience is very much needed for all the above example. You Tubers need patience on  the mount of time it takes to create and edit a video. It is always needed to stay focus and especially to gain subscribers. People are  not going to subscribe  on the first view. It take time and patience. 

A good strategy  is needed over all.  There should be a goal set to accomplish for instance how many videos per week. Also the name for the channel  The video maker must be able to select good focus topic(s). They should  have a good setting in which the video will be taking place for example studio room. Also, good lighting is needed to have a clear video. The You tuber must have a strategy  to be gain viewer and subscribers. This is done by spreading the word, sharing on social media, advertising etc.

Most You Tubers go above and beyond  to make their channel stand out, But it  may takes them weeks, months, even years.

I started a You Tube Channel with my Children. We call it "What We Do".

It's about having family time, and things to do with the children. I wanted to show the world that even though were are busy parent we still have to make time for our children before they grow up.

It takes time, we  made a few video,  but out of the many video we produced I only post maybe two.

Creating the video was not the issue it was fun, depending on the activity lol.  We even made a logo my son is an pretty great artist!

But it took me days to edit it. I needed to download an editing program then I had to teach myself how to use it. I'm pretty sure if  I were a stay home mom It would of definitely  taken me maybe one day vs a few to complete.
I am  currently still working on  strategizing before moving forward with the You Tube channel.
But  you can check us out if you want just click the link below.

Click here to see My Channel What We Do

It isn't a easy task. Having an You Tube Channel is a full time job. This is why most famous you tuber are successful they input time, effort, they are consistent and they strategize to get where they are now. All the  things I didn't do for my channel.

 What are your thoughts?? hope my opinion and suggestions someone out there.

Happy Readings !:)
VQ

Wine , Wine, and more Wine!

One may say The In Between of  stressful Life is ...

White Zinfandel, Moscato,  Sweet Red or Rose Sangria...

The names of my  favorite type of wines.

Who  loves wine ? doesn't like wine??  Who hasn't tried wine??

There are a lot of variety of wine. From White to red, sweet to bitter, and dry to exotic. There's a wine for every type of taste buds.

I'll take any sweet or exotic wine please!!

By all mean I wouldnt refuse a wine unless its extremely bitter or dry. There are wine  that are untorelable.
Ive learned, there's also a  ways to dry drink these bitter and dry wine.

Tips and tricks:
1.The trick is to pair it with cheese.
So you  take a bite of cheese and follow it with a sip of wine.It will taste like wonders.

Im asume its the mixture of the salty cheese,that gives it a good taste.

2.If the cheese is not available and the is not drinkable to you add some fruit juice and fresh fruit.. make your own signature sangria. ;)

It also depends on the brand and location the wine comes from. For instance, Sutter Home and Barefoot both produce wine of type such as the white zinfandel but the taste are completely different.

The little trick that's learned thought out time.

I believe a glass of wine a day  is great for the body and mind.
But if its a really bad day  a few glasses wouldn't hurt as long as its not made into a habit. ;)

specially if  your a parent!

My favorite by far are any type of sweet or moscato.
Just incase anyone wants to send me a bottle?? lol

Guess my favorite Wine  its a blue bottle with tan label anyone want to play... ?

share with me what's your favorite wine??

Do you have a tip or trick for me??

CHEERS,
VQ

Preteens and Their Attitudes.

The In Between of  Life as a Mother with a Preteen

Who of my readers have a preteen or teenager??? Let's chat...

I recall when my child was an innocent  little boy.  Everything was all smiles, all  cute and adorable. 

There was no complaints, no  attitude , no rolling of the eye.

I understand that as a child gets older, he or she will experience  changes and discover new phase in life. 

But why??  To what point do the parents have to deal with there emotional and hormonal  changes??

I love my child, he is very intelligent, talented and gifted, but his preteen stage is getting to me. 

His attitude is what kills me. Literally!! 

It is okay that he is growing, he is going thru physical changes. I understand he train of thought will change. I get he will  have an opinion, we are all entitle to our opinion, but why the attitude? If he disagree that okay, but  does he need to raise  his voice, and  make facials expression.

Oh the facials expression!! the rolling of  the eyes, the raising eye brows and the sideway lips. Oh and especially sucking his teeth. 

Why!!!!!!!

I can be so impatient with him and I may overreact but it just gets so tiering. 

I have tired to speak to him and calmly understand him. I ask questions, I ask for him to express to me what's on his mind, but sometime I do have to become strong with him. I have to punish and discipline him.

It has been better thou, I explained to him how it was for me growing up and compare it to how I am raising him. He was shocked at some of my past experience.  Hopefully  I will get through his changes.

I don't know about other parents, but  having a preteen is stressful. My oldest is eleven years old and I have two other children I  am not looking forward to all these changes.

Let's chats, Give me examples... how can we improve as parents to deal with our preteens or teenagers.??

I look forward for your comments!!

happy reading
VQ

Love and Distance

The In Between of My Love Life ...

Has anyone experience any love ones in the Military force and  or maybe the distance between a relationship ? Isn't it disappointing?  But shouldn't we appreciate  the distance thou?

Ladies and Gents, let me share with you the in between of my love life. As busy as my love and I are, dealing with our daily routine and being single parents, I can't complain. I LOVE US ! We have an understanding, but than there's the distance and The Army :(.

While I refused to date him at first,  I am glad he convinced me to take a chance on us, But it has not been a  simple journey. We are not your typically guy and gal relationship, but is there a typical relationship anyways?

In the beginning, I felt as if our relationship was an experiment. We lived about an hour and half away, usually less. He lived in PA while I am in NJ. It wasn't bad the long distance, since we were both getting to know each other. We both prioritized our parenting duties and we both had our goals. I felt that we were each others comfort and support call.

As the time passed  and the more we spent together  the more attached we became. It was getting more difficult to stay away from one another. I wanted to spend as much as I could with him. But then The Army keeps interfering! LOL.

He first had to leave for eight weeks it was about six months into our relationship. When I met him, I knew he was committed to the Army, therefore I was okay with it. While I was sad he was miles away I understood. I have a few rough weeks, some days I couldn't speak to him since he was busy. During those long weeks, I felt a mixed of emotion mad, sad, anxious. I realized I was feeling this way because I was falling in love with him.  
We spoke about the possibility of  him being relocated, but it didn't hit me until after I saw . The thought of him being gone for a longer period of time frighten me, so I didn't want to be over excite. We knew he was moving, it was a matter of him just waiting for the orders from the Army  to be sent.  We tried to spend as much time possible which .

Thankfully he was relocated in my state, the only down fall is that he lives  two hours away.  He lives down South, while I live in North Jersey. That's not that bad! I know it could of been extremely worse.

We made and continue to make our relationship work. We both alternate weekends, and make the best of it.  The best part about my relationship is that our children like us.:)

But now he is gone again, back to, but thank GOD its just three week this time! Three weeks is a lot people, I cant imaging if it was Deployment. 
Thank Goodness for technology, He tries to calls or video calls me daily... He Loves ME!

I appreciate the time apart thou, I believe it helps strength the relationship.  Not being able to see or talk to your partner can help you build a stronger relationship. You will learn how to communicate better. You learn to trust. You discover a little more about each other physical and mental state. And you will love harder. You will learn to appreciate each other company.

I am thankful that I have committed myself into this relationship.  Since I had  failed past relationship It was hard for me to trust  my boyfriend  at first and communicating is not my best forte, but I over came most of my issues. I am still working on a few, but I will get better.

He will be back home in two week . We will continue to enjoy and love each other company. Distance nor The Army cant break us. We shall see what the future brings.


This is us being us

  I LOVE HIM !!!

Moving Foward

Once you're at the end of a  relationship and you decide its time  to move on, make sure you let it go and move on people!

Let me elaborate for you. When people decide to begin a new relationship they must make sure they are ready to be committed to what the future brings. Don't be stuck in the past. 

People need to stop complicating their own lives. I see people stalking their ex partners, I see people sharing memories about the past WHY ??  If  It's over, let it be! Ignore it.

Plus If you are beginning to date it is very uncomfortable and unfair for the next partner to be dealing with any past relationship issues.

It is understandable that when being in a relationship people find  comfort, security and love between partners, and once a person find their confort zone it may be difficult to let go. 

I understand that when two people are in  a long term committed  it is extremely difficult to overcome. Especially now a day you have  technology  like social media that have memory option to remind you of the good time.  It is even worse if you were married, and have children together or in today society Pets. LOL but its true thou.

These are feeling a person must overcome before starting a new relationship.

People say in order to more on you have to through yourself out there. You can forget about her if you sleep with a new girl. while it might be a temporary fix, THIS IS SO WRONG.! 

People cant replace people. People must let your heart heal. 

Some people may take weeks, or months other like myself years, but everyone is different. 

The heart must learn how to regain trust, love and security, depending on the past relationship situation. 

I see people reposting special memory with there ex-boyfriend  while she claims to be extremely happy with her new guy... that is so disrespectful!

Okay if there was a child involve like I do sometimes and tag the kids father when our children did something adorable, but sharing a special couple moment is a big NOOOO.  

That is a memory that you must keep to yourself. 

Plus if you are ready to move on then you should be able to see this memory and feel nothing. I mean you might be happy about it since we are human after all but feel nothing special in other words.

What is your input world? 

I decided to write about this topic because its a common issue. People are hurting other people because they are hurting inside. 

I can continue to write about this topic but I will choose to let it go and move forward :P

Thanks for stopping by,
VQ

Happy Birthday to Us!!!

Its my birthday and I'll cry if I want too! 

Thirty two years ago I ruin my sister birthday party.... Or was I the best Gift EVER ?? 

My sister was born September 12,1985  at around 11 P.M.  A year later her 1st Birthday Party had to be cancel since my mother rush to the hospital to have me  on September 12, 1986 at  around 11am.
I
sn't it super cool????
Of course I was a blessing. :) 

For many years we share the same parties, same cakes. My sister was  over it!  She wanted her own party.
For our 15 and 16th birth my mother got use our own cake. It wasn't anything big just a few friends over our apartment and TWO separate cake !!!  It was great..
That our last childhood birthday. After that we were went our separate way. She move to Puerto Rico, then Florida, we only saw each other from time to time but didn't celebrate our birthdays. 

So for our 30th and 31st birthday. We had a 30's birthday bash. I travelled to Florida celebrated with my sister, cousin and friends. Took a helicopter ride around Disney. It was amazing!

We agreed to try to do a get together every year. 

This year she came to NJ. We will have a nice few days off for relaxation, fun ,reunited and love. 
WISH US HAPPY BIRTHDAY WORLD!!! 

VQ

Welcome to Motherhood !!

Scientifically, a women who become pregnant and births a child is known to become a mother.

As easy and pleasurable it is to create a baby, does it give women the privilege to be called a Mothers?

When I look at the world we live in I see a lot of types of  mothers. I see mothers struggling with their children, (sometimes is one child). I see mothers with multiple kids. I see mothers  who overprotect kids. I see spoiled kids, I see abused kids. I see mothers hanging out while the kids are where?? . I see all types of relationship and kids. I'm not one to judge, because motherhood is not easy at all, but why have kids?? What is your definition of motherhood?? Should all women be mothers??

Women have their own opinion of the definition of motherhood. We have women who believe since they birth a child they should be consider mothers. We have the women who play the motherly role for wrong reasons for example keeping the family united.  We also have women who believe motherhood is a choice.

You are wondering why I am so sure there are women out there with such mind set, right?

I know because I could relate. I believed I was a mother because I birth a child, so no one could tell me other wise. I try to use my child as an excuse to continue a relationship and keep my family united. I now believe motherhood is a simple choice, and wonderful experience that teaches lesson to help one become a better person.

I first became pregnant by a man barely knew. We were two young adults in our early twenties both in college. At that time we were both broken from long term relationship. We were each others rebound,  just keeping each other company , comforting one another and having a good time. Six months into our good times we find out I was pregnant.
Even though, I knew my child's father wasn't happy with my pregnancy he respect all my decisions and agreed to be there for my baby. We play it casual and continue on with life.

Was I freaking out ... Yes ! I was twenty and pregnant.! Still in college , still wanting to discover myself, still trying to grow up.

But I had always prayed to God that I didn't want to feel alone, I always prayed not to be pregnant unless its was meant to be. I kept in faith, I knew God wasn't going to mislead me. Everything  happens for a reason, I always took everything as a lesson to be learn.

I withdrew from college and focus on working, my goals was to work as much as I could so that I can provide for my unborn child. I was lucky to had a coworker that help me find my first apartment. Everything was coming along as planned. I was ready to become a mother.

Nine and a half months later moment was here I gave birth twice to my first born, eight and half pound  baby boy. Yes twice!! But that's another story. Ask me, comment if you like to find out. :)

Our prince was born, and we realize it was no joke. The waking but ever three-four hours, (4 hours is actually a long sleeping time by the way)  the feeding , changing , crying... it was all too much!
But I wanted to become a mother, so I needed to deal with all that responsibilities. It never ends!

But it didn't stop me, for I was pregnant again!

For my second child it was every unexpected. I didn't know I was pregnant until I felt a little movement, Literally thought it was a parasite, LOL.
But for this time around I knew I had to become more responsible, it wasn't about just having a baby and becoming a mother. For my  4lb premature baby boy, I needed to mature more and realized that motherhood is more complex. My second child needed more attention, he was getting up about every hour to two hours.  My relationship with my children father was already rocky and I return back home to my mother. I wanted to work it out with the father of my boys, but I wasn't sure he did, So I gave him a break. It wasn't easy being parents to two babies.. Literally they were 13 months apart.
I overcome my situation and better my life, found a better job, found a new  apartment for my boys, bought my first real car.
I even asked the father of  my children to marry me, so that we can keep the family united. THAT FAILED.

We learn how to co-parent, for me as a mother it was all about my boys. I woke up took them to the sitter, work and then came back home to them.
When they got older, I woke up took them to school, work,  football practice, and back home.  Of course, I feed and bathed them, Lol.
I barely had time for myself, But I chose this life.

I now have three children, my last child was a 6lb baby girl. I believe it was harder for me. Since I had my boys already bigger potty trained, they feed themselves, they were big boys. I had my boys trained they were very independent.  For my daughter, It was like starting over but worse.  I had to wake up every 2-3 hours, change diapers.. ohhh the girls diapers are messier, and I had to be more gentle with her. She was our Princess, Still is!
Imagine taking the boys to school, football practice, work and do all the mommy duties with a new born baby! OMG I was exhausted. BUT I wouldn't change it for the world.

I do not regret being a mother, I live for my children but I did at one point in life.

Life has taught me how to embrace my actions instead of regretting. I chose to be a mother first before anything  or anyone else.

I wanted and still do want to give my children experiences, I didn't have growing up. My goal is to continue to grow with them as a parent. To learn, laugh, and love with them.
Motherhood is about the experiencing and  maturing as a mother,  not having as many kids possible. A person shouldn't have children if they cant support, and handle them.
Sometime motherhood is that key to brighten a woman life, having a child can filled an empty hole. Its a beautiful experience, I would recommend it to women who are ready for adventure and a new chapter of life.

Check out My Children (11, 10, and 6 year old)... My reason to waking up every morning !

What is your input in motherhood? What type of mother are you?  Can't wait to read all about it .
VQ






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A Littlte about Me, You and Us.

I asked my family and close friends to describe me in one word. People responded the following, distinctive, lovely, caring, brave, independent, awesome, feisty, generous, most honest, blessed, beautiful, and I can't leave out bitchy. One friend said, I'm a wonderful mother who is driven, ambitious and a hopeless romantic with a realist mind set, this was one of my favorite.
I could agree with all their responds, but I believe they speak quite highly of me, for I am also shy, self conscious, defensive at time and much more.

I am not Perfect.

I describe myself as an independent women who grow up quickly to become a mother of three beautiful children, two boys and one girl. A mother who thrives to achieve what's comes to mind for her children, for all I do is for my children.
I am a college graduated that have yet complete her dream career.
I consider myself God Princess, because if it wasn't for my faith, I wouldn't be able to achieve what I am today.
I still  have much more to learn, experience and achieve. I am looking forward to all the new adventures that life has to offer.
Or is it looking forward to all the adventures I have to offer life??? Hmmm...

You will learn a lot more about me through this blog. You will read about my perspective in life, thru the interesting topics I will be posting. You will read about my past, present and what I want in my future. You will read about how truthful I may be as well as dramatic, I can be very dramatic! :)


We will have a lovely time reading and learning about each other experience in our lives and the different opinions we'll be sharing. You will be responding to my posts and I will be awaiting to  discover your thought. We will have a lots of debates, but it will be lots of fun.

I hope you can imagine a little a bout me, the rest you will have to read throughout my post.

Happy Blogging World.
VQ